life is wonderful.

wow. this past week zoomed by.

it was a tad bit stressful and also fun.

my car had been undrivable for a few weeks now and 

i've been looking into all of my options.

my sister jumped on board and started calling dealerships

and really working hard to get me a good deal.

she did just that! 

i drove home my first ever brand new car yesterday afternoon!

i am madly in love.

i want to drive everywhere!

wyatt's birthday last weekend turned out great.

more people came than rsvp'd but that's ok, it was great.

i realized though that i am the world's worst party planner.

i'm serious.

but no one seemed to care, and we all had fun.

wyatt had a blast and got many wonderful gifts.

 

last week i stayed with penny and oliver while my sister celebrated her birthday in vegas.

i got the kids off to school for their last day of school.

my nieces esme` and zadie were also down for the weekend.

it was busy weekend!

 

the past week...

lovin' some lovin'

im loving everything right now.
all of my life. it's way too good.
i feel like i don't even have the right to complain or wish things could be different because i am so lucky to have things the way they are. there is too much good in my life not to be thankful for it.

we've been doing a lot of gardening lately, gettin our hands dirty!
wyatt is lovin' it!
i am going to look into a co-op pre-school on monday for wyatt, i am so excited that i can't wait.
i think he is beyond ready for it. i can't believe that my baby wyatt is going to be 4 in june, time flies, it seriously does. it flies by at lightening speed. it's terrifying. another reason to love your life and be greatful.

i didn't really make any new years goals or anything like that, i normally wait until after.
that's a lie.
i normally don't even make any.
however, i am going to make some goals now.
simple ones.

• i'm going to journal more, well... i'm going to start one so i can keep track of important and special things in my life and the boy's lives. i think it's amazing to be able to look back and see what was happening in your life.

• i'm going to (try) not to use any plastic bottles. i am going to be better at re-using and recycling. although i have to admit i pretty much rock at recycling, but there is ALWAYS room to improve right?!

• i'm going to be more grateful and appreciative of other people and what they do for me. 

• i'm going to practice being more forgiving, i forget easily but i don't forgive quite as easily, especially my self.

• be present. just be.

boys are pretty much amazing.
i love the random growling and the ability to bust out hot wheels cars anywhere and make tracks and ramps out of everything!
they don't have volume control. at all. they are always on high volume, even during all of the quiet parts in a movie.
they love their mama more than anything, mama's boys all the way.
their energy just don't quit! ahhh!
they enjoy some serious conversation about poo-poo and pee-pee, and making farting noises is second nature. boogers are cool not gross, and they prefer to wipe them on someone definitely not in a tissue (ewwww!). they climb everything and enjoy anything that is going to make their mother hold her breath. they prefer dirt baths to regular baths and anything can be turned into a weapon, yes even their mother's makeup.
nail polish is fun, but not in the conventional way. maybe to decorate some match box cars or paint their walls with.
they always know what they want, even when they aren't sure and they always--yes always--know where they are headed.
boys are amazing.

i got this new wrap because it was on sale at target.
i don't love it, i think i can make a better one. i'll show you when i do it :)

owie is at the age he can eat food!
so exciting.
wyatt is a big helper in the kitchen, he loves making owie's baby food.
with a food processor there is no excuse not to make your own baby food! it cost me about $4 to make a few weeks worth of organic baby food. you can freeze it, my brilliant sister freezed the baby food she made in ice cube trays and just popped them out as needed!
plus you can get all fancy with your mixtures! make your baby go mmmm!!

 happy saturday!
we are enjoying the sun staying out later to play with us! yay!


oh yeah...
this happened!!!!!

crazy right? 5 months already. wowzers.
like i always say, time is a'flyin!

it's a boob. get over it.

this is hilarious and so very true.
i really don't understand the hype on the offensiveness of breastfeeding.
breast were designed to nourish our children, not sell beer or men's cologne.

 found it here

 found it here

found it here

found it here

wyatt.

i wish there was a safe way to sleep in the bath tub and for the bath to stay hot all night long.
so relaxed right now. i probably should have gone to sleep an hour ago.

i've been concerned about wyatt's behavior for some time now, and if you follow then you know how we've struggled with this. i have started and stopped diets, behavior charts, read books, tried new techniques and the list goes on. i will admit i get frustrated with no results and will often give up before anything can be achieved, so, i admit i am bad at this.

lately i have thought that it must be me, my parenting is making wyatt behave like this.
i spoil him too much, i give him too many treats, i don't spend enough one on one time with him, it's being a new big brother, i don't give him enough time outs, maybe i give him too many times out?
i am always questioning me. lately i've been at my breaking point.
on some level i feel like this horrible behavior is taking my son away from me. i can feel my self so frightened and intimidated by this that i almost on some level give up. i feel like throwing my hands up in the air and not dealing with it, which would be so unfair to wyatt.

i can see him struggling with this.
he doesn't want to be naughty. he's a good boy who is proud of him self when he does the right thing, when he makes people happy and he loves life so much and has this amazing creative and caring personality, of course it shines when his tantrums aren't in motion and he isn't screaming at me that he doesn't like me or wants to rip lion apart.
it makes me sad to see him struggle.

i was up until about 1am last night looking at emotional problems in young children.
it seems to me the he has a disruptive disorder, specifically ADHD. he has tantrums that on average last for about 20 minutes and a lot of the times go for 45-60 minutes. he has trouble calming himself down on his own, and he can be physically aggressive as well as verbally aggressive. i can tell he loses control, he physically can't control himself or calm himself down or even let me calm him down. it's heart breaking really.

i called his doctor today and he told me to call my insurance and make an appointment with a psychiatrist for an evaluation. i've read that if you catch it early on that you can often times avoid the route of medication. i just want wyatt to be happy, i don't want to see him struggle.
i hope it's all just spoiled, 3 yr old boy behavior, but we'll find out.
i have a feeling that this is going to be a journey that i will be on for quite awhile and i am choosing to share it in hopes to help another parent or to even connect with someone.

being a single parent is hard, it's me and my boys.
i am thankful that i have my sister and kellie who are helping me with this and being super supportive. i just want wyatt to be happy, i want to be able to enjoy this time in our lives without the struggles. but that's wishful thinking.
i chose to think that my higher power would only put these challenges in our lives to over come and create new paths, to bring us together and make us stronger.

putting baby in a corner!

Not literally!!

  geez...

I'm getting the baby's area (little room) ready, starting to wash clothes and register-all that good stuff.

I've been in slow motion with this pregnancy. 

I'm excited to meet this baby but I feel if maybe I take my time, time will move slower. 

ummm? NOT SO MUCH. 

I know I know, it doesn't make sense. 

It's as you would imagine, I'm in fact running out of time. 

ahhhhhhhhhh!

Pictures to follow soon, well, whenever I get my butt in gear!

--------------------------------------------

oh so funny...

Wyatt has been saying THE funniest things ever this week.

His word of the week is "frickin". 
Obviously he has gotten this glorious word from his dear uncle Matt. 

He said, "mommy, did you know I frickin love you?" 

My heart melted, as horrible as it is that he used the PG version of the "F bomb". 

Oh my goodness. 

Today I said "ouch the baby keeps kicking me!"

Wyatt responded by suggesting that we give the baby medicine.

I love this guy so "frickin" much it hurts!

Am I going to have enough love in me to love another little boy?

What if he's not as cute?

What if he's not as smart?

What if?

Everyone says I'm totally normal for having these doubts, but motherly love is so powerful that no matter what, I will be in love with this baby. Deep down I know I will be in love with this baby but when I'm with Wyatt it's hard to imagine. I feel like I will have to share my love and I know that's not the case, God just gives you more love to use. 

My mom reminded me the other day that when I was pregnant with Wyatt, I feared that I wouldn't love him as much as Brody, my dog. That obviously was not the case. :)

 

March! March! March!

It's been a really long time since I've acknowledged ever having a blog. 

What can I say? 

Life happened.

So here it is....

My boyfriend is now my fiance.

Wyatt is going to be a big brother..... 

I am 14 weeks pregnant.

YAY!!!!

I did the bleach gender test where you mix an even ratio of pee and bleach and if your 

pee fizzes like ginger ale then its a girls and if it foams and  bubbles up it's a boy and.....

by the results of this old wives tale it's a girl. We will see in a few weeks. 

The test was accurate for both my nephew and one of nieces but then again 

it's a 50/50 chance of being right haha.

My Fiance (HAHAHAHA this still sounds so funny to me!) just turned 29...

Last year in his 20's!!

My Tres Leches cake is now famous! If I do say so my self it was delicious!!! 

My mom moved out and gave us the big 3 bedroom 100yr old house... 

So much to do but most importantly, I get to decorate!!

It's been fun so far but so much to get used to. Wyatt is getting used

to Doug, Doug I and are getting used to living with each other, I'm

getting used to being pregnant again, cooking 3 meals a day, grocery shopping, paying bills, 

keeping up with laundry besides wy's and mine, studying for classes and so on... oh my goodness.

It's a new Chapter in my life, I haven't read too far into this chapter yet so 

I'll let you know what it's like as we get there ;)

I think Wy and are going to go to Disney Land, it's about to rain so no one will be there!!

Have a spectacular weekend!

what's the bedtime around here?

it's after ten o'clock and I hear Wyatt calling out for me from his room.

 It sounds mean but I'm trying to ignore him in hopes of him giving up and going to bed. 

This is an on going battle of sleeping with me vs. his big boy bed. 

He will have a cycle of being absolutely the best sleeper ever and then I go and F it up by giving in.

Now he's just being monster. 

He is repeatedly getting out of bed, hiding, throwing Lion and spitting at me. 

I'm trying the Dr. Phill and Super Nanny approach by laying him back down calmly and repeatedly without any reaction. This last time I went in there and hugged him and gave him a few kisses and now I haven't heard a peep. I don't know what works. I think it so depends on Wyatt's mood. 

I don't ever want to put him down for bed and make him lay there if he is scared or just in need of love. 

I do know that this bed time thing is pretty draining.
I'm sure we I will figure it out.

I  bought my first real grown up bed today!

 It's fantastic and wonderful. 

I have found my new favorite place, I never want to get out of bed EVER. 

I bought it HERE today and they delivered it a few hours later and took away my old mattress. 

I'm over due for a good night of sleep. 

peace out.